Okay, not much to say about school today except that that was one brill piece of music what Tavi and her group were rehearsing. Again, not exactly death metal, but I actually found it kinda soothing and calming, that tune they were playing. Can't remember what it was, I think one or two of them might have said something about playing for Elise or something or nothing.
Right, so they've just finished up, and me and Tavi have gone to hang out. Turns out that “for Elise” or however you spell it is the name of the song they were playing, not who they were playing it for. Oh,
I went and spoke with Miss Falsetto later today, and she said yeah I could join. She also said something about setting up DJ mixing tables for some of us, so the whole thing's right up my street. But this is where it gets real cool – she said that if my parents asked why I was so late getting back, not that they could care less about what time I get home, then she'd lie to them about me going to homework club after school had finished, and then they won't even know I've been doing music stuff behind their backs. Best. Teacher. Ever!
Now this is way more like it! I went to the after-school club that Miss Falsetto was holding, and straight away I got to play on the mixing desk. I found this really neat cello piece that Tavi likes, and I'm working on this groovy new remix that makes it kinda like a slowish calm disco piece – sort of where you're slow-dancing or just taking a break. Tavi seems to like what I'm doing with it, which is weird because it's more sort of cello dubstep than actual classical. Mind you, there was a lot of disco music being played at the Nightmare Night thing, and she didn't complain about any of that. Maybe she's the kind of pony what secretly likes rock and techno and dubstep and all that jazz?
But yeah, at least I'm doing something right if she likes it. Again, didn't think she'd dig my disco remix, but I'm well glad she did. I dunno what it is with me, but for some reason I just feel like I wanna do everything I can to impress that filly, even if it means playing the cello myself one day. Even when I'm focussed on this piece what I'm doing right now, I've still kinda got her in my head saying “This is a marvellous piece of music,
Right, better get back to doing this music before I lose my cool.
Entry 85 and a bit
YEAH, BABY, YEAH!! Only like forty minutes or whatever at the mixing station, and already I've got myself a song that I can play at a disco! I played it back to Tavi and Miss Falsetto, and they were like “Great job,
And that wasn't even the best part either. Miss Falsetto actually put it on a record so that I could take it home and listen to it whenever I wanted, and maybe even play it at nightclubs or wherever. So yeah, take that, Mom and Dad! I've got a disco record, and I'm gonna use it whether you like it or not! And you know what else? I'm gonna make more of these and become a rock star, and there's no way you're gonna get me into that stupid fabric business of yours! DJ Scratch FTW!
Hang about! There's something flashing on my flank...
Entry 85 and a bit more
Holy Celestia, I can't believe this is happening to me! My Cutie Mark finally appeared just as I was finishing my last entry, and it's a musical note thingy, so it looks like I really am gonna be a rock star after all. Reason enough to be over the moon, right? Wrong!! Tavi and Miss Falsetto may have been like “Wow!” about my Cutie Mark, but my parents are totally gonna go ballistic when they see it! This should have been the best thing ever, and all I can feel about it is like I'm about to get eaten by a bugbear! How has my life managed to go so wrong?!
Tavi let me spend the night round her place so I can sort of lie low for a bit. Her parents were like “What?” when they saw me, but she told them all about my Cutie Mark problem and talked them into fixing me up some food and the spare room. I can't thank her enough for trying to help me like this, but how long will I be able to keep this from my folks?
Doesn't look like I'm gonna get any sleep tonight.
Ugh! What a morning! I couldn't even get like five minutes of shut-eye without thinking about the kick in the backside I'm gonna get from those pushy parents of mine, and it's really doing my head in. I can't even eat anything because I'm feeling kinda sick – that's how worried I am about my damned Cutie Mark! My parents treated me bad enough when I was just a blank-flank, I hate to think what they'd be like now.
Tavi's been trying to calm me down for like every waking hour since that stupid thing appeared, but it's just not working. Today's trig lesson was a nightmare which made things a heck of a lot worse, and then I got held back after biology because I fell asleep in class. I couldn't even stay focussed in music, and that's my top subject at the moment. Curse you stupid Cutie Mark! Why did you have to appear now of all times?! Why couldn't you have just waited until after I'd graduated?!
And trust that stuck-up Harpo to bang on about what a dozy old cow I am! Throughout recess, he's been going on about “How do you become a musician by nodding off every so often” and all that trash! If I wasn't so scared of losing Tavi's friendship, I would have punched that guy in the eye! Just you wait, Harpo, I'll give you “nodding off” one day!
Entry 86 and a bit
Yep – just as I feared! Tavi and me were just leaving the school gate for her place when my old stallion came stomping up to us like “Where were you, young lady”, and as soon as he saw my Cutie Mark, he was like proper mental! Without even looking at me, he went off on one about how shameful it was that I was turning my back on my duty, and how disgusted he was with me choosing to become a common music pony! I mean, really, this is getting stupid! WHY THE HAY CAN'T YOU GET IT INTO THAT THICK, EMPTY HEAD OF YOURS THAT I DON'T CARE ABOUT STUPID DUTY! THIS IS MY LIFE, I'M THE ONE WHO SHOULD BE DECIDING WHAT THE HAY I DO WITH IT!
Okay, now I've calmed down a bit. Anyways, Tavi tried to reason with him, but he just yelled at her to stay the heck out of this. He then dragged me all the way back home and told Mom about my Cutie Mark (while I was in the same frigging room as her!), and then sent me to my room while he went and spoke with the school. Good thing he didn't bother searching through my saddlebag, or my record would have gone bye-bye before I got the chance to use it. But still – it's not fair that those idiot parents of mine should be treating me like this! I've told them again and again and again that fabric's not for me, and all I ever get is a whole load of flak! I swear, if those two snobs don't stop pushing me around, they're gonna live to regret it!
In fact, stuff this! If my folks won't let me do what my Cutie Mark tells me, then I'm through with them! Let them plot against me! There's no way they're gonna get me to give up my life ambitions!
I hate my parents so much! As if me getting a Cutie Mark they didn't want me to have wasn't enough, now they're trying to show me up in front of the entire factory! I didn't even have time to eat breakfast before Dad dragged me out of the house, and when he got me there, he was pretty much shouting out about my Cutie Mark for like the whole world to hear! Honestly, how did I wind up with such an uncaring pair of planks for parents?! Why can't they just let it drop?!
But more to the point, what the hay is that windbag who calls himself my Dad trying to achieve by telling all the factory workers about it? It's not as if any of them care anyway – and I'm not joking either! Stockinette was like “Aw yeah, this factory's as good as mine now”, and saying all sorts of things about me not being good enough for this place anyway. I dunno if Dad ever heard any of that, but then what would he care? The way he talks sometimes, it's as if he doesn't give a toss about the guys who work for him. Heck, it wouldn't surprise me if Stockinette does wind up taking over the factory after all! She is mean enough!
Good thing I can't say the same about all of them. Tracey Stitchit isn't much of a talker, but when I told her and Needlecord about my Cutie Mark and how Dad was sort of beating me up about it, she said all sorts of sappy but touching things to me about how nopony should have this happen to them. Needlecord was pretty sympathetic too, and said that if this was what I was destined for, then that's what I should do with my life, and stuff what my parents say. Even Tiff had some nice things to say about me, and the weird thing is, when I told her what I thought of her, she explained that it wasn't how I thought it was. Turns out the whole reason she'd been gossiping about me with the other workers was because she genuinely cared about me, and wanted me to be happy with my life – which my parents obviously don't! She says she could see me going onto much better things in life than just making cloth and stuff. Seems I'm grossly misinformed about gossipers. Oh, and did I mention that she's been going out with our courier, Mailwing Keystone? Well, she is – and she seems pretty happy with him so far.
But heck, they're getting along way better than I am at the moment. As soon as I got home, Mom and Dad marched me into the front room and told me they were sending me to a finishing school in Fillydelphia. Great! Just when I thought things couldn't get any worse, now I find I'm being disowned by my own parents and packed off to some concentration camp just so they can mould me into their own little robot! Buzz off to a totally different place and be tortured out of your mind, they say! It's for your own good, they say! I'm not having it! I'm really, really, really not having it! If they want some fabric nerd as their daughter, then they can darn well go and adopt one for themselves, because there is no way in Tartarus that I'm staying a part of this family anymore!
Never thought leaving school could be so tough on me. My parents have been talking with the principal and said that I'm gonna be leaving for Fillydelphia at the end of the week, so I've only got five days left to spend with Tavi and Miss Falsetto and all the rest of them before I go.
I had a real hard time letting Tavi in on what that stuffy pair of snobs were doing to me – must be because it means I don't get to see her again or whatever. She seemed to take it pretty hard herself, because she was like really upset when I'd finished telling her. Turns out I was the best friend she could ever have had, which is kinda weird because we don't share the same taste in music, but I'd have to agree with her on that one. I've had a fair few friends, but none so close as Octavia. I'm really gonna miss her.
Anyways, we've both come to the agreement that we need to make the most of what little time I have left before I have to fall off the face of Canterlot. Well, for now at least. We've already spoken with Miss Falsetto, and she's agreed to let us hold a sort of disco session before Tavi and I go and hang out beneath the stars, so at least I'll be going out with a bang. I just hope I can find a way to go back and see Tavi again.
And so we come to my final day of school. I always thought it'd be like the best thing ever, but here I am looking like a complete crybaby because I'm about to leave this place for good, and all my friends as well. I've made so many happy memories in Canterbury Prep, and I'm about to just march away from them as if they never meant nothing to me. This is gonna be a heck of a wrench for old muggins here.
Most of today's lessons were kinda okay, but I just don't think my heart was really in it, so expect a lot of F grades in my school report. But what do I care about grades? It's not as if I'm gonna be getting any in the near future, the way I'm planning things. I just wish I could have got that A* in Music I'd been after, but whatever. It's not like I need one in order to write a song.
Entry 95 and a bit
Wow! That was the single kindest thing Miss Falsetto has ever done for me! When I turned up for after-school music club, she presented me with a Grade A certificate in Music, said she'd pulled a few strings with the faculty and got them to grade me before I was even done with high school. We had one heck of a jam after that – my disco record, some House, some Techno – even Tavi joined in with her cello, and that's like the least dubstep instrument you could ever lay your hooves on! Go, Tavi, you rock!
We might have gone on a bit longer than we should have done, though, because it was like five in the evening when we were finished. I might have gotten a bit emotional towards the end, because just before me and Tavi walked out of the door, I just sort of lost control of myself and hugged her tight. Might have left her shoulder a bit wet, but I don't really care – she's become way more of a Mom to me than anypony I've ever known, and it just feels so wrong to be leaving her behind.
Mine and Tavi's evening out went pretty well, considering this was our last day. We went for a bit of a wander round the park for like an hour or something, had dinner in this really smart restaurant place near the castle, and then we spent the rest of the evening sitting on a hilltop and gazing up at the stars. While we were up there, she was asking me one more time if I really had to go tomorrow morning, even offered to come with me if I did! But as much as I would love for that to happen, I just can't do this to her. She's got a great life here in Canterlot, and I don't wanna take that away from her, however much it hurts. I'm just gonna have to accept that this is the last we're gonna see of each other for some time, if ever.
Now, this is where I think I might have got a touch of the moon or something, because just before we headed home, I might have leaned in and kissed her. It was a weird experience, but one I'd readily go through again if we should ever cross paths again – it was like there were fireworks going off in my head, my chest was pounding like anything, and I felt really hot around the face. I think the only thing that spoilt it for me was that my eyes were like really wet, but what really surprises me is that Tavi went right ahead and kissed me back. She didn't even ask what I was doing!
It's kinda weird how something like this can be so distressing and elating at the same time. On the one hoof, I feel like I'm on top of the world right now, but I also feel like really heartbroken and stuff because my first kiss with Tavi is also gonna be my last. She must feel the same, because there were tears in her eyes when she pulled back. Maybe leaving her behind isn't gonna be such a good idea after all. But what does it matter? My fate is sealed – tomorrow, there's gonna be no more fabric trash, no more stuffy parents, no more being told what to do, no more lectures, no more stupid ideas about duty and stuff......no more Octavia. In short, it's gonna be the worst day of my life.
Goodbye, Octavia. I'll always love you.